The Short Answer Is No, You Should Not Trust Her
A lot of guys get into relationships with women with the best of intentions and one thing leads to another. You have a child together and you’re not married and you think I’m in love. She’s a good person. She’d never cut me out of my child’s life. I’ve been in this child’s life since they were born. I’m engaged. I’ve done all the right things.
Guess what? If she changes her mind about you, she gets pissed at you or whatever, if you don’t have a court order, she can do whatever she wants if you’re not married to her, literally. And the law is 100% on her side.
Furthermore, she can go to DHS Admin Court, get you adjudicated the father or an order to pay child support without you having any right to even talk to this child because the Admin Court has no power to give you any rights to the child. They can only order you to pay.
So the short answer is no, you should not trust her. She may indeed be a good person. She may treat you really well, but if you’re not married to her, she’s holding all the cards. If you’re a poker player, guys, you can think of it this way.
If you were unmarried to her without custody and visitation or without a paternity decree, she’s holding a pair of ACEs and you’ve got a seven-deuce. You’re screwed if she decides to make an issue of it.
So it’s in your best interest. Get that paternity decree, get that custody and visitation order, even if you’re on good terms with her. And if she really is a good person and cares about you, she shouldn’t get in your way on that.
She should be 100% on board with you establishing your rights because she should want to have something in place in the event that you and she do wind up crosswise at some point.
And the reality is, even with a good relationship, you’re going to disagree about things from time to time. You don’t want to be in a position where she can look you in the eye and say, “Screw you. I’m going to do what I want and you can’t stop me.”
So guys, get that paternity decree. And if you need help with that, you should go to dads.law where fathers are not disposable, my name is Brian L. Jackson and I’m an Oklahoma father’s rights attorney, if you are looking for a Divorce Attorney for Men, visit dads.law.