Child Custody

Desperate, the man sought legal advice after his wife moved out of state with their child without notice. Can the judge make her bring the child back? Yes, it’s possible, but he must act quickly. Even if she’s settled in, the court could order the child’s return. The judge cannot force her to move back, but the child may need to return to him. In some cases, custody could even change in his favor. It’s a complex situation, requiring an experienced attorney.

Many people ask whether a child can simply choose where to live if one parent wants to relocate. The answer is—not exactly. The issues of relocation and the child’s preference are separate, but the child’s preference can play a role when the court is deciding whether to allow the move.

Why Is Moving Your Child Over 75 Miles Such a Big Deal? Why Not Under 75 Miles?

This is a great question—why is 75 miles the threshold for relocation issues involving children? It may seem arbitrary, but that’s the line the legislature has drawn. If a parent intends to relocate a child more than 75 miles from their principal residence, they must follow a formal legal process, including providing notice and allowing the other parent an opportunity to object.

Now, moving under 75 miles can still create significant problems—especially if the move takes the child to a different school district or makes custody exchanges much harder. While it may still disrupt the current visitation schedule, the law presumes that moves under 75 miles don’t substantially interfere with the other parent’s rights or ability to maintain their relationship with the child.

What gives your ex-wife the right to relocate with your child? Well, as U.S. citizens, we all have constitutional rights that allow us to live and relocate wherever we choose. However, relocating with a child is a different matter entirely. If your ex-wife is not the custodial parent, or if you share joint custody and she is not designated as the primary custodial parent—meaning the child’s principal residence is with her—she cannot unilaterally move with the child. Even if she is the custodial parent, she cannot simply relocate with the child without following legal procedures. So don’t try to handle this alone.

Child relocation can be a complex and challenging issue for many parents. When custody has already been established and one parent wants to move far away with the children, questions of the child’s best interests come into play. Even if you believe the move is harmful, proving it in court can be difficult. Judges often consider factors such as maintaining connections with friends, school, and extended family through travel or virtual communication. If you are facing a potential relocation situation, seeking experienced legal advice is crucial. Consulting with a knowledgeable attorney can help you understand your options and navigate this complex issue.

Your ex-wife may not be able to relocate with your child if it’s in bad faith. This could mean moving with the intention of harming your relationship with your child or making visitation more difficult. In such cases, the court may consider the relocation to be illegitimate and manipulative. Your ex would need to prove that the move is for valid reasons like a better job or family support. Ultimately, the decision will be based on what is in the best interest of the child. If you’re facing this situation, it’s important to seek legal advice to understand your rights and options.

When dealing with a divorce and talk of relocation by an ex-spouse with the children, taking action is crucial. The type of custody arrangement already in place will determine the options available for the parent. If joint custody is established, the primary custodian holds the legal right to seek relocation with the child. If the ex is the primary custodian, specific relocation procedures must be followed. Proper notice must be given, and there is a 30-day window to object. It’s essential to act swiftly and understand the strict time limits when challenging a relocation, seeking the right legal advice is key.

In Oklahoma, parental alienation may not be an official diagnosis, but therapists can still testify to the behavior. Whether labeled as parental alienation or not, if a parent is unjustifiably alienating a child from the other parent, the judge will intervene. It is crucial to focus on the behavior itself, rather than the terminology used. By taking action against this harmful behavior, parents can protect their children’s best interests. To address parental alienation in your divorce case, contact Tulsa family attorney Clint Hastings at 918-962-0900 for a consultation or representation.

A non-custodial parent in Oklahoma is entitled to the same information and records as the custodial parent under Title 43, Section 109.6 of the Oklahoma Statutes. Records like school, medical, and daycare records must be made available upon request. There are exceptions, though, where the other parent can ask the court to restrict access if they believe it’s not in the child’s best interest. If you’re being denied access, you have rights, but you need to assert them. Stay tuned for more advice on what to do if you’re still struggling to get access to important records.

A viewer recently asked, “What is a Parenting Plan Conference?” That’s a common early step in many Oklahoma divorce and custody cases. A PPC is considered a non-adversarial court setting. You and your co-parent will appear before a judge who gives a brief talk about how to handle the divorce in a way that protects your kids—especially when emotions are high early in the case. You’ll also be instructed to attend a four-hour class called Helping Children Cope with Divorce, which costs about $55. Every parent must take it. The goal is to help you avoid behaviors—intentional or not—that can negatively affect your children.

A Judicial Order of Proper Conduct (JOPC) is a court order that sets ground rules for how parents should behave toward each other and their children during a divorce. These terms vary by county but typically include instructions like not using children to send messages to the other parent, not speaking negatively about the other parent in front of kids, and not denying visitation without good cause. The goal is to protect kids and keep parents focused on their well-being. Judges can order them based on concerns or requests from attorneys. If you have questions about JOPCs or need help with your divorce case, consider reaching out for advice.

Today, Clint discusses the importance of school involvement in custody cases. Being active in your child’s school life, attending meetings, and understanding their educational needs can significantly impact your case. Judges look for consistency and genuine interest in your child’s well-being. Neglecting school involvement can hurt your chances of gaining more time with your child. On the other hand, showing up, participating, and taking notes demonstrate your commitment as a parent. Don’t overlook the core of your child’s daily routine. Stay engaged, know their schedule, and be part of their school life to strengthen your position in a custody dispute.

Today’s topic is a big one: the difference between a Disneyland Dad and a consistent, involved parent. If you haven’t heard the term “Disneyland Dad,” it refers to a parent who only focuses on the fun—trips, pizza, movies—but doesn’t take on the day-to-day parenting duties. In court, that can work against you. It’s very easy for an opposing attorney to question a parent on the stand and expose that pattern. Start tracking everything you do with your kids in a calendar. These everyday moments matter in court—and they matter to your kids long-term. Start now. Be intentional.

Today’s video delves into the importance of extracurricular activities in custody cases. While some may view these activities as optional, courts often see them as vital for a child’s well-being. Participating in extracurriculars can promote social development, reduce stress, and boost physical fitness. During a custody trial, your involvement in these activities can significantly impact the judge’s decision. Supporting your child by attending practices, games, and encouraging their interests is crucial. Documenting your participation and staying actively involved can demonstrate your commitment to your child’s growth and well-being. Remember, these seemingly “extra” activities can speak volumes in a custody battle.

Today’s focus is on medical and dental involvement. That includes physical health care, dental visits, and mental health counseling. A lot of dads haven’t been very involved in this area, which can be a factor in custody cases. Judges often treat past behavior as the best predictor of future behavior. Take an honest look at your past involvement, start participating now, access medical records, and document your involvement. Be ready to show the judge your level of involvement. It’s essential to be specific when discussing your participation in your child’s medical and dental care – this type of preparation can make a significant difference.

Today, we’re continuing my series on parental fitness—factors judges look at when deciding custody and how I help my clients prepare for trial. In this video, we’re talking about mental health history and how it can affect your custody case. Courts Look at Effort, Not Just Diagnosis. The biggest mistake I see people make is thinking the diagnosis alone ruins their chances. The court’s priority is always the best interests of the children. If you’re concerned about how your mental health history might affect your custody case, don’t ignore it. Tackle it head-on, take it seriously, and let your efforts speak for themselves.

Today, we’re continuing our series on parental fitness and the real-world factors judges look at when deciding custody, beyond just what’s written in the statutes. These are the things I talk about with clients all the time to help them improve their chances of getting custody. Let’s talk about criminal history. This comes up often—fathers asking whether a past conviction will affect their custody case. The short answer is: yes, it can. And the more serious or recent the charge, the more impact it could have.

Today’s topic: drug and alcohol use—a big one. Now, this may seem obvious, but you’d be surprised how often clients try to downplay it. These aren’t minor details—they’re major red flags in custody court. Even if you’re no longer drinking or using, your history matters. Judges weigh past behavior heavily. If Mom doesn’t have that kind of record, this factor alone can tip the scales in her favor, even if everything else is equal. So what can you do? Get ahead of it. If you’re struggling with alcohol or drugs, get help now. If it’s in your past but you think it might come up—start testing voluntarily.

Today’s focus is on discipline, a critical factor in determining parental fitness in custody cases. Whether it’s providing structure or avoiding harshness, your approach to discipline speaks volumes about your parenting style. While Oklahoma allows spanking within limits, it’s best to steer clear of it to avoid potential complications in court. A significant contrast in discipline methods between co-parents can heavily influence a judge’s decision. Emphasizing consistency, structure, and calm discipline over punitive measures could significantly impact your custody outcome. For personalized advice or strategic guidance, reach out to Tulsa child custody attorney Clint Hastings. More insightful videos on parenting fitness are coming your way.

Today’s focus: basic care and daily routines. We’re talking about everyday parenting responsibilities—getting the kids dressed, brushing teeth, bath time, meals, and hygiene. These seem simple, but they carry serious weight in court. Judges want to know who consistently handles these tasks. Many fathers assume, “Of course I can do that!” But the key question is: Have you been doing it? If that’s the case for you, and you’re in the middle of a divorce or custody dispute, start now. Establish your consistent routine when the children are with you.