Beware of How Hidden Texts Disrupt Cases
You need to be aware that certain texts, within a string or time period of messages, can destroy the pattern of communication—and here’s how we deal with that at trial.
Hi, I’m Tulsa Dads.Law attorney Clint Hastings. I practice here in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where I focus on father’s rights, and I’m now in my 25th year of practice.
Understanding the Impact of Text Messages in Legal Disputes
What I’m talking about is this: someone comes to me and says, “I’ve had these communications with my wife over a period of time—she’s terrible, she’s said all these things, she’s threatened to move with the kids, admitted to drugs, had men in the house—and I want to do something about it.”
So I say, “Okay, give me the text messages, and we’ll talk about what to file.” They send the texts, and at first, it looks solid—it backs up exactly what they’re saying. It seems clear that this is a pattern of behavior, and we might move forward with a protective order, an emergency custody motion, or a custody modification.
The Importance of Providing All Relevant Information
But then I later find out they either didn’t give me all the texts or failed to mention messages that break that pattern.
Suppose she’s sending threatening or concerning messages, but then there’s a text where you say, “Hey, I’m going out of town this week—can you watch the kids all week?” and she replies, “Sure, no problem.”
Consult With an Experienced Attorney for Guidance
That single exchange can undo an entire pattern of messages you thought proved your case. I’ve had many cases like this—people withhold or forget about messages that completely change the story.
A pattern is what helps establish that a behavior is ongoing and serious enough for the court to act on. A single incident may not be enough for a judge to issue an order, but multiple consistent incidents—a pattern—can.
Take the Next Step in Protecting Your Rights
So don’t give your attorney incomplete or misleading information. It will only end up hurting your credibility and ruining your case. If there’s a point where you re-engaged with her—like asking her to watch the kids or suggesting dinner together—you’ve essentially undone that pattern. You need to own up to that.
Give Tulsa men’s divorce attorney Clint Hastings a call at 918-962-0900 if you need a consultation on this or any family law matter, and we’ll be glad to help.
