Balancing Visitation Time with Your Child’s Events
Hi, I’m Tulsa Dads.Law attorney Clint Hastings. I practice here in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I focus on fathers’ rights, and I’ve been practicing for about 25 years. This issue comes up a lot. I talk to dads about what’s happening on the ground during visitation, and I hear this often: they have a young child—maybe three, four, five, or six years old—and every time visitation comes around, the mom says, “He’s got three birthday parties today you need to take him to. He has a class at the gym. He has a playdate on Sunday.”
Balancing Time with Your Child and Other Scheduled Events
Now, these are things both parents should participate in, but if you’re on a limited schedule—say, every other weekend—you need time with your child for bonding and for your own emotional well-being. Divorce can be very hard, and that direct time with your child matters.
So, what can you do? You don’t have to attend every event. It’s perfectly reasonable to choose one birthday party instead of three. It’s also reasonable to ask that playdates not be scheduled during your visitation time. Judges generally won’t look down on you for making those decisions.
Navigating Family Events During Visitation Time
Family events can be even trickier. Sometimes the mom wants you to bring the child to her extended family gatherings. That can be uncomfortable for many reasons, including being around your ex and in-laws. You’re not expected to do all of those things either.
The key is balance. If you can, attend some events—especially the important ones. But don’t feel overwhelming pressure to meet every demand out of fear of how it will look in court. Judges understand that visitation time is limited, and they don’t expect you to give it all up for outside activities.
Get Legal Guidance on Handling Visitations
If you’re in a similar situation, we can help. These practical issues do come up in court, and how you handle them can make a difference. Give Tulsa visitation enforcement attorney Clint Hastings a call at 918-962-0900, and we’ll be glad to talk through it with you.
